I am not sorry for being late, because I have nothing to apologize for. I was not late. I was quantum. I existed in all possibilities, a dizzying potential, on time, late, even early. I was still in bed, out of bed, reading, sleeping, eating a slice of toast, logging into work, applying mascara, snoozing my alarm, making dinner, rolling out a yoga mat, eating a different slice of toast, and closing my computer for the day all at the same time. I was all of these moments of the day in one rush of experience.
And only because you logged into the room and saw it was empty did my wave function collapse. Your point of view chose this reality, of all the realities, the one where I was still making a cup of coffee and throwing open the curtains and trying not to knock the plants off the shelf. So I will not apologize for being late, because I will not apologize for being observed.